When the Music Stopped Read online

  ‘If you are the dutiful daughter I have been led to believe, then you will do as your father orders.’ He was getting angry now.

  ‘Then you have been misinformed. I am far from a dutiful daughter. I can be disobedient and wilful, with an explosive temper. I will also make my own decisions in life – and that is not to become a brood mare for an aging politician! I will save you the embarrassment of having to propose to me because I will certainly refuse!’

  ‘How dare you speak to me like that? You need a good thrashing to bring you into line.’ He stepped menacingly towards her.

  ‘If you raise a hand to me, sir, you will regret it. I am not a weakling, and am already taller than you. I am also sure society will relish the story of your violence.’

  He stepped back, his expression thunderous as he glanced towards the door, then he pushed past her and stormed out of the house.

  The full import of what she had just done hit her with a force that took her breath away. Such an outburst would have serious repercussions, not only for her, but for their mother as well. They had appeared to go along with this scheme in order to save their mother from any unpleasantness, but she had just thrown all their good intentions away. There was going to be trouble now.

  Turning to leave the room she was surprised to see their butler, Adams, standing just inside the door. ‘Has my mother sent for me?’ she asked as calmly as possible.

  ‘I heard raised voices, and as you were alone with the gentleman I came in case you needed assistance.’

  She took a deep breath. ‘It was an unpleasant scene. How long have you been there?’

  ‘Some time, Miss Lillia.’

  He had obviously heard everything. ‘I am afraid I lost my temper, and without my brother’s calming presence I fear I have caused a lot of trouble.’ Her eyes misted over with tears and she wiped them away with a sweep of her hand. ‘I do miss him so much. If he had been here this would never have happened.’

  ‘We all miss him. This house isn’t the same without your music and laughter. If you and Mrs Holdsworth need help at any time you can come to me or Harry, the footman. We will do what we can for you.’

  ‘That is very kind of you and comforting to know. Now I must see how Mother is.’ She dredged up a smile to show that his kindness was appreciated, although she doubted there was little they could do without putting their jobs in danger. Anxious to see how her mother was, she hurried out of the room and up the stairs.

  When she reached her mother’s room she was surprised to see the maid sitting outside the closed door. ‘Why are you here, Mary?’

  ‘The butler has given orders that Mrs Holdsworth is not to be left alone. One member of staff must always be close at hand.’

  Alarm swept through her. Why would he issue such an order? Was she suffering from more than a bad headache?

  Lillia slowly pushed open the door. There was only one dim light in the corner of the room, leaving the bed in deep shadow. She carefully made her way over and sat on the chair beside the bed. ‘Mother,’ she whispered, ‘are you awake?’

  ‘I am.’ The reply was faint.

  ‘I have never known you suffer with severe headaches. The doctor should be called.’

  ‘That is not necessary. I shall be well after a good night’s rest. How did your lesson go?’

  ‘Very well. The professor is hard on me, but it is for my own good. I met a Brigadier Stansfield there and he knows Lester. He spoke highly of him. He was a pleasant man – for an officer.’

  ‘Don’t judge them all by your father, my dear. I was told Lord Dalton was here. Did you see him?’

  She had been hoping to avoid this but she couldn’t lie to her mother. ‘I did, and I lost my temper and told him I would never marry him. He was angry when he left. I am sorry to be causing you so much trouble. I tried to be civil to him – I really did …’

  There was a muffled sound from her mother and she leant over the bed in alarm. ‘Are you all right?’

  Sara turned her head and looked at her daughter. ‘We do not have trouble, my dear. We are now facing a serious crisis.’

  Gasping, she switched on the bedside light. ‘Oh, what has happened? Your face is all bruised.’

  ‘If I told you I walked into a door, would you believe me?’

  ‘I would not!’ she replied adamantly. ‘Not with Adams insisting a member of staff must always be near you. He did this, didn’t he?’

  ‘You are not the only one who speaks their mind now and again. We had a terrible argument.’

  ‘And he used his fists!’ She was incensed. ‘He can torment Lester and me as much as he likes, but when he shows violence towards you he has overstepped the bounds. Where is he? I will deal with this.’

  ‘No, my dear, you must not confront him while he is in such a rage. He is out, anyway, and I doubt will return for some time. Now, let me sleep.’

  She bent and kissed the top of her mother’s head, devastated that she had been treated so cruelly. No matter what she had said, something had to be done to make sure this never happened again. She was the only one here, so it was up to her.

  Chapter Six

  It was midnight before she heard her father return. Unable to sleep she had not retired for the night but had waited in her room, furious that their mother had been treated so harshly and longing to have Lester by her side again. Her mother had told her not to confront the general, but rest was impossible until this crisis had been dealt with.

  The moment she reached the bottom of the stairs the butler appeared. ‘Where is he?’ she asked.

  ‘In the library. I believe he has had a little too much to drink. Is there a message you would like me to deliver?’

  ‘Oh, I have a message, but he will hear it from me.’

  ‘Perhaps the morning would be a better time?’ Adams suggested.

  She shook her head. ‘This can’t wait.’

  Adams reached the library door before her, rapped sharply and stepped inside. ‘Miss Lillia wishes to see you, sir.’

  ‘Not at this time of night. Tell her to leave it until morning.’

  Stepping round the butler who was blocking the doorway, she walked up to her father. ‘This will not wait until morning. I have come to warn you never to raise your hands to our mother again. If you do we will see you have cause to regret your brutality.’

  He glared at her in disbelief. ‘What happens between your mother and I is none of your business. You are just a child and your threats are powerless. Now get out of here before I lose my temper and throw you out of my house.’

  ‘It isn’t your house,’ Lillia told him triumphantly. ‘It legally belongs to the Kirkby family and you cannot touch it. If anyone is to leave this house it will be you.’

  ‘Is that what your mother told you?’ he asked, stepping menacingly towards her. ‘That ancient agreement is worthless and can easily be swept aside. I can do whatever I like.’

  That news had shaken her. He seemed so positive, but she could not back down now. ‘If you try to take complete possession of this house then we will drag you through the courts until every aspect of your life and brutality is public knowledge.’

  ‘You are too young to do that, and your mother never would!’

  ‘That is not so, Gilbert,’ said a soft voice from the doorway.

  Sara came in and stood beside her daughter. ‘I have allowed you to do as you please while the children were growing up. I wanted them to have as normal a life as possible. You gave me that chance and I was happy to remain the docile, obedient wife. However, circumstances have changed. The twins are older now and quite capable of making their own decisions. You have unwisely decided to disrupt their lives, and I can no longer stand by and see that happen. If you take any further action against us we shall fight you, very publicly through the courts, if necessary.’

  ‘You couldn’t do that,’ he snarled. ‘Don’t forget your past will also be revealed, and it is I who will be hailed as the generous, kind man.’
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br />   ‘That could well be true, but I care nothing for my reputation. What happened in the past is no longer of importance. The only thing that matters to me is that two talented children, who have no blame attached to them, are allowed to pursue their chosen careers.’

  Lillia’s head was buzzing as she listened to this extraordinary conversation. What was all this talk about reputations and the past?

  ‘You have made a grave mistake, Gilbert,’ Sara continued. ‘If you had not interfered you could have continued to live the comfortable life you have had since marrying me. I have always felt that I owed you that, but from this moment on your authority over us is at an end.’

  He was obviously shocked and Lillia was sure the glass in his hand was shaking. It was remarkable to see him at a loss for words. Her mother then took hold of her arm and guided her out of the room.

  Adams and Harry were both waiting outside the door and remained there while they made their way up the stairs. The general did not attempt to follow them, though.

  ‘What was that all about?’ she asked her mother the moment they were in their rooms. ‘He looked stunned.’

  ‘No more questions tonight.’ Sara sighed. ‘We both need sleep, my dear.’

  ‘Of course.’ She kissed her mother’s cheek. ‘Thank you for coming to my aid, for I fear I was going to lose that battle of wits.’

  ‘You disobeyed me and I was forced to do something I have been trying to avoid. I owe your father a debt and I did not wish to make an enemy of him, no matter how difficult the marriage has been.’

  She was upset now. ‘I am so sorry. I know you told me not to confront him, but …’ She gave a shaky sigh.

  ‘You have always faced problems head-on, and have the tendency to speak without thinking. I was well aware that you would not sleep until you had given vent to your feelings. Don’t be upset,’ Sara said as her daughter’s eyes filled with tears. ‘It is how you are, and it was brave of you to defend me.’

  ‘Have I made things worse?’

  ‘You have brought things to a head sooner than I would have wanted, but perhaps that is not such a bad thing.’ Sara smiled and squeezed her daughter’s hand. ‘Now go and get some rest, my dear.’

  She made her way to her room, chastened that she had acted without thinking – again! She must write and tell Lester everything that had happened tonight.

  When she went down to breakfast the next morning she was delighted to see her mother already there and looking her usual composed self. Make-up had been carefully applied to cover the bruises on her face.

  ‘Did you sleep well?’ Sara asked her daughter.

  ‘Not really,’ she replied, serving herself a good helping of food from the various dishes, and then sitting opposite her mother. ‘Everything was running through my mind. Lester will want every detail of what has happened. Can we tell him he can come home now?’

  Sara poured herself another cup of tea before speaking. ‘I have been giving this a lot of thought and, reluctantly, I have decided it would be wiser for him to stay where he is for the time being.’

  ‘But why?’ She was astonished and disappointed. ‘Surely there is no reason for him to remain there? He didn’t want to go. He only agreed to it in order to protect you from Father’s wrath. His sacrifice hasn’t prevented that happening so why are you saying he must stay there? I don’t understand.’

  ‘If you will stay calm and listen, I will explain.’ She waited for her agitated daughter to be still, and then continued. ‘Gilbert has apologised to me for his conduct yesterday, and I believe he is truly sorry.’

  Lillia gave a snort of disbelief and opened her mouth to express her disgust.

  ‘Don’t say anything,’ Sara warned. ‘I accepted his apology, in the hope that he will not pursue the subject of the ownership of this house, as he had threatened several times. It is unlikely he would win such a case or risk the publicity, but should he succeed in having it transferred to him then you and I can go and stay with my good friend, Isobel, for a short time while we look for suitable accommodation. To take two of us would not be easy for her – three would be impossible, and I could not ask it of her. It would be better if Lester remains where he is until we know exactly what is going to happen. It would be wise to be prepared for any eventuality.’

  She was devastated as she realised how precarious their situation could be, and even harder to bear was the thought of continued separation from her twin.

  ‘I know this is not what you want to hear, my dear, but it is for the best. You said that the army officer told you he is doing well and has made friends, didn’t he?’

  She nodded.

  ‘Then let him stay there while we deal with the situation here. Don’t tell him what has happened. Keep your letters cheerful, without a hint of the crisis we might be facing. Do you understand the necessity for such secrecy?’

  ‘I do,’ she admitted reluctantly, concerned that he may pick up her feelings through their twin connection. ‘If he knows what is happening he will return home immediately.’

  ‘Exactly, and there isn’t anything he can do. In fact, if he comes back it will only make matters worse. Your father tolerates you, but he dislikes Lester intensely.’

  ‘I didn’t know that.’ She was shaken by this news. ‘I cannot recall Lester ever doing anything to cause such dislike. He has always been polite and courteous towards him. I am the one who is often rude and disrespectful.’

  ‘You are twins but your temperaments are opposites. Lester is thoughtful, calm and controlled; you are emotional and explode at times. Those different traits make you suitable for the professions you have set your hearts on.’

  She smiled then. ‘Lester always says I make a perfect prima donna, and I suppose his character helps him to be an excellent pianist.’

  ‘Without a doubt.’

  ‘I do so wish we could bring him home. I find our separation very hard.’

  ‘I know you do, my dear, but this may be a blessing in disguise. It has made me realise that I have made a grave mistake in your upbringing. You should have attended school and mixed with other children instead of being tutored at home. Music and each other has been your whole world.’ Sara shook her head. ‘That is so wrong.’

  ‘How can that be?’ She was completely confused. ‘We have been happy. It was what we wanted.’

  ‘And there lies the problem. Tell me, how many friends do you have?’

  ‘Friends? I have never needed friends, and neither has Lester.’

  ‘I have been lacking in my duty as your mother to allow this to happen. Your father saw this and stepped in to do something about it.’

  ‘Are you now saying that what he did was right?’ she asked, astonished by what she was hearing.

  ‘His intentions were good; the way he went about it was wrong. I am aware that this is not going to be easy for you to accept, but you must both now make separate lives for yourselves. It can be a harsh world out there at times, but you have to be able to cope with the good and the bad on your own. I feel confident that Lester can do that, but I worry about you. You are ill-equipped to deal with the real world, and that is my fault. I would like you to think about taking up an interest of some kind, or even a profession you could become involved in until you reach your goal as a singer.’

  ‘But I have an interest and a proposed profession – singing.’

  ‘You need something else.’

  ‘Are you suggesting I give up singing?’ she asked, thoroughly bewildered.

  ‘No, I would never do that. You are good and the professor says you show great promise, but it will take time for you to become established as a performer. During that time I want you to have something else in your life. You need to start to mix with people from all walks of life.’

  ‘I have started to do that with the WSPU.’

  ‘Their aims are commendable and I wholeheartedly agree with them, but there is no telling where their civil disobedience will lead. Do you want to end up in pri
son? Such a disgrace will certainly harm your desire for a singing career.’

  ‘Oh no, I couldn’t risk that.’

  ‘Can you think of anything you would be interested in? A milliner, perhaps?’

  ‘I only want to be a singer …’ She burst into tears. ‘And I want my brother back.’

  Sara gathered her heartbroken daughter into her arms and let her cry out her grief and confusion. This was the most vulnerable of her children and she had to find a way to help her live an independent life. Without Lester’s calm strength to lean on, his sister was in for a rough time. Distressing as it was, it had to be done.

  As soon as the sobs faded, Sara smiled at her. ‘Do you feel better now?’

  ‘Yes. I am sorry, but I am very confused and frightened.’

  ‘I know you are, but will you promise me you will try to think of something you could do away from music?’

  ‘I promise.’

  Sara kissed her daughter on the forehead. ‘Go upstairs and wash your face, then we will go for a walk.’

  How could she have been so foolish to allow this to happen? Sara watched her daughter leave the room, her heart heavy with sadness and regret. Of course she knew what had happened. When the twins had begun to show musical talent at such a young age she had been overjoyed, and this had blinded her to everything else. The best tutor had been engaged, and over the years she had watched their talent blossom. It had meant so much to her. Especially Lester’s growing mastery of the piano. Many times she had sat in the music room and watched him with tears in her eyes as the memories swept in. Not once had it occurred to her that her children were isolated. That was not only a mistake; it was selfish of her. As they grew older she should have been urging them to go out, make friends and learn what life was all about outside of the music room. It had taken her husband’s action to wake her up to what she had allowed to happen. Now her beloved children were suffering because of her selfishness, and she was causing them more confusion by insisting they remain separated. The next few months were going to be difficult for all of them, and she prayed it wasn’t too late.